Freddielinton wrote:
It sucks living at home. It really does. But they seem to think I have a problem and now because I find Dolls attractive, they think I'm a pedophile and they want me to get help. I can't say anything to explain it to them or make them understand. They are so set in their ways.
I'm a 29 year old being treated like a child.
Freddie, I am not sure what your employment situation is, but if you can afford to move out, you need to take that big step. I am not saying this to down you or belittle you, I am saying this because you are only holding yourself and your own growth by being kept in that box. Your family will never respect you as an adult until you make some big steps to break free.
Free to live how you want. There is
NOTHING WRONG with loving satin.
NOTHING. It is not even remotely perverted. Do we do some freaky shit with our stuff? Hell yeah we do! But it isn't so "out there" when compared to other fetishes. It is not immoral or illegal. It doesn't produce unwanted offspring, it does not spread STDs. Appreciating a woman being augmented by some downright sexy satin is NOT WRONG.
You need to be FREE to be YOU. That will NEVER happen until you change your environment. That's a big step and trust me I know more about this than you think I do, but it is really the ONLY way for you to have the life meant for you.
Freddielinton wrote:
I think my Mom is going to force me to get rid of my entire collection. She's also going to open and throw away anything else that comes in the mail.
and destroying or disposing of your property that you paid for is a crime in every state. Heck, in your state it may even be a felony depending on the dollar value. Family or not, anyone who steals or destroys your stuff needs to be held accountable. If it were me, I would be calling the police and filing charges, You have to set a boundary. It's also part of breaking free.
Freddielinton wrote:
Yet my Sister and Dad smoke Pot, a still Illegal drug in this state, and yet that's okay. They can do that, but I can't do what I do. One is legal, one is not.
and I am sure when the cops show up, they will be more interested in the weed than some dude who buys dresses. Trust me on this...let's just say I have inside knowledge.
Freddielinton wrote:
My life is basically over.
Or it's just beginning. All depends on how you choose to look at it. Getting out of the restrictive box you are in is a choice you will have to make. Choose wisely.
Freddielinton wrote:
They pressure me so much to live a normal life; to go out and date, and it drives me crazy. I've made amends with being single the rest of my life, and now I'm going to be forced to talk to some fucking shrink and go on dates and shit. I don't want any of that. The older you get, the more difficult it becomes. All of my friends are engaged, married, or have kids. I don't feel like there's anyone left but me. I also just feel like I'm not ever good enough for someone. I have a lot of problems, especially with my confidence.
What is "normal"? We're in the same boat dude. I am older than you by about 10 years but single. One thing I will say is all those "friends" who are "happily" married...well, guess what, all of them tell me constantly how blessed I am to be single. And you know what, they are dead right. I live in my own home, I can squirt all of the satin I wish. I can choose to bring a girl here or not. I come and go as I please. I pay all the bills. My house, my rules.
Sure, it gets lonely at times especially during the holidays. But I have a great career and can fill that time filling in at work so others can be off.
Not a bad deal. Again, it's all about perspective and how we choose to look at life.
Freddielinton wrote:
I can't say that I don't deserve it, especially lately.
You deserve to be happy Freddie. Happy and free to be who you want to be. Never forget this. FIGHT FOR IT if you must. But NEVER give up. EVER.
Freddielinton wrote:
Last Friday, my best friend in the entire world, my cat, passed away. I am devastated. There is a huge hole left where my heart used to be. I constantly break out in tears. We had a really special bond, and I just thought we had more time together. I can't help but feel guilt. I recently got a new job, and I just feel like I didn't get to spend as much time with her as before, and I should have taken her to the vet or something. She was perfectly fine though, and she passed sleeping right next to me like always. It's just really difficult. I've lost my best friend.
Loss sucks. My best buddy from 1988-2005 was my Siamese bastard cat. He was a cat that was left for dead on the side of the road. We rescued him. He only purred when I was around. I haven't been able to have another pet since. I grew up with the little guy. He was there during those awkward years of 8th grade through high school and into early adulthood. People who don't or haven't owned pets don't understand what it is like.
Freddielinton wrote:
And then this fucking bomb is dropped on me that I know is going to just roll right into the weekend and probably the next few weeks. I could never kill myself, but I wish I were dead now.
If you ever feel that urge, I want you to reach out to me. Inbox me for my phone number. It isn't your time yet Freddie. Trust me if you ignore anything else I have to say, hear these words.
Freddielinton wrote:
It has been a pleasure, but I just don't think I'm fit for these places anymore. Maybe I do have a problem. Maybe I do need to stop. I don't know. I think it would be best if I just stay away.
I hope you break free from the chains that bind you, and get out of that house and come back. You are not abnormal, defective or broken. You are a great guy and one day soon you will see that.